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Friday, June 8, 2012

reality check

I write today with mixed emotions. This is not easy for me to write, because I don’t like to talk about the bad, the ugly stuff. I probably shouldn’t, or at the least I should tread lightly. I am known for saying what I am thinking...quite plainly! It’s been a difficult few days for me. My emotions have been a bit out of wack. Dreams seem to mix with reality and reality seems more like a dream sometimes. I have learned to live my life one moment at a time. (Psalm 31:14-desperate I throw myself on you: you are my God! Hour by hour I place my days in your hand...)

I have come to realize that the reality I once knew is no longer my reality. At least not for now. That is really hard to wrap my my mind around. I think it is human nature to just assume that your life is what it is and will always be that way. When things change, it throws us for a loop. I think I have spent the last couple of years waiting for life to get back to normal...not realizing that I am living the new normal. How do you go about learning to like a new normal, a new reality? If you know me at all, you know I don’t like change a whole lot! I guess God thought this would be an interesting lesson for me to learn. Ugh.

As I was reading today this scripture came to my mind.

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted 
    and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

Of course, I can’t help thinking to myself that possibly, had my heart not become so hard, it would not be broken, but instead, pliable like clay in His hands...but I still believe that, even as I write with a heavy heart, that God can repair what has been broken, for nothing is impossible with Him. Maybe I will just have to be a mosaic of the pieces instead of the original piece of art that He was working on.

I know this is short today, but I just don’t have much more to say that can be said from fact...not emotion.

I am listening to switchfoot as I write this and "I dare you to move” just came on. This may not be your style of music but I love what it says...

"maybe redemption has stories to tell, maybe forgiveness is right where you fell, where can you run to escape from yourself, where you gonna go, where you gonna go, salvation is here!"

I dare you to move!

We truly do have to move from where we are now, to be where God wants us to be in the future. (possibly it’s just emotional movement, or maybe there is some action that we need to take) If we don’t move, if we don’t make an effort, if we don’t lift ourselves up off the floor, we will still be sitting in the same place 10 years down the road, wondering why God hasn’t done anything to change our situation, when all along He has been waiting on us to make the first move...

Thanks for stopping by,

crazymom.crazywife.crazylife.

Wendy Jo

2 comments:

  1. I needed to read this today, Wendy, as I can totally relate. So glad I clicked over.

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  2. Thanks Kristen. Glad to be an encouragement. :0)

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